Order of the Holy Hand Grenade of Antioch

I note with pleasure that Edward Yong (aka Sprezzatura) is still among the living and the weblogging. I also note that he has recently instituted the “Cardinal Humbert Prize” for Latins who say particularly silly and ignorant things about the Eastern Churches. I’m sure that he will find plenty of more than qualified candidates, and will have a great deal of fun in doing so. I am looking forward to viewing more of these prizes, and reading the manner in which Edward lambastes the recipients of his “awards”.

I, however, proceed on the principle that one can catch more flies with honey than with vinegar, but even more with ordure (although why one would wish to catch flies in the first place is beyond me). Regardless, on that principle, I have decided to institute the Order of the Holy Hand Grenade of Antioch, and to bestow this honor on Latins and Westerners who have been particularly accurate or kind in presenting the Eastern Churches to the Western World.

I’m afraid that because of my impecunious state, I can neither send the Holy Hand Grenade to members of the Order, nor can I be present when it is awarded. I have taken the liberty of preparing the Rite for Investiture of the Holy Hand Grenade of Antioch for members of the Order, and I publish it here for their use, and the public’s edification. For those who are members of the Order, and who wish to complete the Rite, they can purchase the Holy Hand Grenade here and administer the rite themselves (or with a group of sympathetic or not-so-sympathetic friends).

And, for the first member of the Order, I can think of no one more deserving than Fr. Al Kimel, and his weblog, Pontifications, whose entries in that regard have accurately and often kindly presented the Eastern Churches to the Western and the modern worlds. To Fr. Kimel, then, my congratulations (or if he prefers, my condolences).